a journey in the unknown
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.......is not polyamory (many loves) and, of course, it is not monogamy.
But here is the paradox:
Authentic (meaning, being true to one’s self) is very much a form of open relating. Likewise, authentic polyamory, in all of its varied forms and protocols, is also a form of open relating!
We might call open relating the “formless form of relating” since its only requirement is authenticity.
Whereas monogamy includes strict promises and the forms of polyamory include a wonderful emphasis on honesty, changing agreements and consensus. Open relating includes nothing but the authentic living of one’s own personal truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth!
Therefore if one’s authentic truth is monogamy so be it. Likewise if one’s authentic truth is one of the forms of polyamory so be it. And then if one’s authentic truth is “free dancing” (dating) or multiple, permanent, long-term relationships then so be those also.
Time, energy and space agreements (how long we stay together and where, live together or not, money etc.) are always important but they are second in importance to the living of one’s truth.
When one is truly empowered to take the complete freedom and responsibility that is inherent in open relating (not so easy to do) one finds many surprises in store.
Certain myths become quite exploded.
1) relationships are more casual,
2) one cares less for or loves less certain partners,
3) open relating automatically means many lovers (polyamory) or
4) depth of intimacy is lost or discarded, or
5) one becomes less selective rather than more selective or,
6) (most difficult to understand) the simple having of other relationships has a direct negative impact on any other relationship.
These and other common myths relative to the increased freedom are shown to be, through one's own experience, what they really are. Myths.
Here in nice poetic form with Taoist undertones is a summary of:
“The Wisdom of Open Relating.”
Last edited by Greg Ehmka (2008-01-22 23:37:07)